Incomplete

(I posted this on my 365 project, but I wanted to share it here.  And I swear, I'm going to post more.  Things have been hellish lately.)



When I saw the theme for the week, I instantly thought of one person to take a picture of. Problem - that person is who knows where in a submarine. That person is my hero in more ways than I can share in the space this box gives. He made a choice 14 years ago come January to join the Navy. It was not a smooth ride at first, but he settled in his current job. He loves his job, stress and all.

I've been wearing this necklace almost nine years. It was a gift from him our first Christmas, shortly before our first patrol together. Over the years, he has jokingly called it my fidget device. I've rubbed the silver coating off of the front. His dog tags are on the necklace as well. And the dolphins are a pin that have made their appearance before in my project.

My husband helps keep me, our family, everyone safe. In trade for that service, he sacrifices time with his loved ones. Misses first steps, birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. It can be hell some days. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I have my loving husband, who has given me the world in our daughter.

And you know one of the best parts? Those videos of homecomings you see on T.V.? The ones with the over flowing waterfall of emotion pouring out of the loved ones? I've seen it. I've felt it. I've been there. Waiting on pins and needles on a pier watching for the sailor with red hair. Then getting that hug and kiss. Seeing the look on our daughter's face - The "Where the hell have you been?" one. And just wanting to keep touching his hand or his shoulder to make sure you aren't dreaming. When incomplete, becomes complete again.

And hearing him say my name. He always chuckles softly when that's one of my first requests.

If you've made it through this, thank you. I'll admit I've been crying during half of it, so I don't know if it makes much sense. This just felt like one of those pictures and captions that had to be done.
 

Who I am #2: Submariner's Wife

I've been married for almost eight years. When I met my husband, I had never really known anyone in the military. I had grew up next to one of the largest Air Force bases, but that's about it. I still remember to this day, he sat me down and laid out all of the facts of how his schedules work. It can be emotionally taxing at times, especially now that we have a daughter. For all the time away (with little to no communication), to the long, wonky hours, to the times he is home, it's all worth it. I share him with the sea, but I don't mind. A little salt water makes him happy and makes him who he is. I wouldn't change that for the world. I'm so grateful that I have him in my life.

The picture is of my wive's dolphins. They are a miniature version of his submarine qualification pin. Dolphins are the symbol of the submarine fleet.

So...where is your husband?

(Looking at my old blog, I found this post...enjoy!)




Who knows what made me think about this today, but, here are some funny ways I've explain where my husband is when the Navy kidnaps him away. Keep in mind this are coming from a Trident/Missile Tech wife.

1) He is playing hide and go seek. (This one gets interesting looks.)
2) Business trip. (I usually say this when people won't leave me alone when it comes to asking about where Ryan is.)
3) He'll be back in X amount of time. (This can vary from a guestimate of the time or me saying 3 months, when I know the pull in date is next week.)
4) Playing air boss. (He controls the only thing with potential for flight on a trident. Plus, I can neither confirm nor deny him answer the phone at launcher with "Tower, Air boss.")
5) Being a rocket scientist. (Well...he is!)
6) Off being Navy Boy. (Typical answer for NOTU ops because I really don't want to explain FCETs to people, plus that entire OPSEC thing...lol.)
7) Playing with seamen. (Yes, I'm a sick puppy, and my mind has been warped by a missile tech. Fear me. *grin*)
8) Somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean. (I get neat looks from this one. It also shuts up "Where does he go when he is on the sub?" They don't believe "I don't know.")
9) Re-inacting Down Periscope. (Need I say more?)
10) Driving some khaki crazy. (I believe this is one of the main jobs of Missile Techs.)
11) Memorizing OPNAVs. (Boredom + Fire control = Really bored Ryan. This, however, is usually done after all other means of entertainment have been exhausted.)
12) Pissing off the back aft folk. (He is nuke waste. So, he knows them too well.)
13) Being practical jokester #1. (I love my husband's sick, twisted sense of humor.)
14) Doing strange things with DitDots. (I never knew what DitDots were until I married Ryan. Well I knew what they were, just not the term DitDots. Oh the possibilities I have learned.)
15) Inventing new forms of rickey rockets. (I'm still not allowed to have a true rickey rocket. Something about the caffine going straight to my already overly active hyperness.)

It's Over!

With a phone call I had this afternoon, this patrol is over. My husband is back on dry land. All is well as it can be. (It would be better if we were there, but we'll see him soon.) For all the "keeping it together" that I've done, I still got all teary eyed and rambling when I heard his voice. I haven't talked to him on the phone since May. As those that know Ryan, he isn't much of a phone person, so I'll be calling him back later. *giggle* I'm just happy he is home.

This patrol did show me what I can do this. After 5 (or 6, I lost count) years at NOTU, I got very used to Ryan being home or atleast in phone contact constantly. So, the thought of a patrol, scared me to death. I've shown myself that I can do this. I can keep everything together, keep the kid alive, and keep myself alive. Do sometimes I think I took the "easy" way out by going home? Sure. But it ways it was harder cause I didn't have some of my usual coping things.

Alison hasn't talked to him yet. I think she had an idea I was waiting for a call today. I mentioned it in passing last night. This morning she saw my cell by my bed and went "Daddy?" Little girl picks up on small things these days. Should be interesting to see if she'll talk to him on the phone tonight. It's always a hit or miss. Giggle point: Apparently Ryan really did eat a lot of pizza underway. I find that hilarious that she was so sure daddy was eating pizza.

Now the wait to see when we have leave, when he'll be here, and what the plan is. I can be patient (somewhat) for that though, because I can atleast talk to him now.